Overwhelming Joy

What happens after you decide to adopt two babies?


Total joy, covered with an invisible, spiritual battle. 


Swords crash over your head. 
You don't see them.  You feel them.   


You love your babies so completely and so instantaeously that it shocks you.  You never believed the stories about this instant love. 
You assumed it takes time. 


It doesn't.

You LOVE them.


You love them so much that at the sight of their malnourished little arms, you forget that God has brought them this far and has this under control, and you stay up all night long trying to ship extra formula to Ethiopia.  Overnight express.  On a Friday night.  You beg, you plead, and you discover that this is impossible.  And unnecessary.  And rediculous.


You love them so much that you go post-natal.  And when the first relative calls to voice general concern about adopting two infants when you already have two toddlers, you unleash a Mama Bear response.  You cry and bang your fists at how badly you can mess things up, even when you try not to.  The Sermon on the Mount breaks your heart anew, and you ask Him to teach you again, for the thousandth time.


Your car gets broken into.  They take your stuff. 
(You remember that it's just stuff.) 
You get dressed for church.

Your other car breaks down.  A blown transmission and more money.  You look up to the sky, still fresh with Sunday morning hope, and you know that the battle is just beginning.  You are only at the 46 hour mark.  You realize that there aren't enough seats in that car anymore, anyways.


You regroup.  You ask God to protect your joy, and you remind Satan of where he lives and how to get there.  You read Philippians, the Timothys, Titus, and you pray. 


You show the pictures to friends at church; crying, laughing, and already bragging about imaginary special talents and strengths that you think your new children might have...they are strong, determined, brave, joyful....


You carry your referral pictures up and down the stairs, from room to room, because you can't bear to be away from their sweet little faces for one second. 


You clutch 8 pieces of paper containing all the information you have about your new babies, and you march into an International Adoption Clinic in Raleigh.  You decide ahead of time that if this doctor does not have good news, you will find another one who does.


You sing songs in the waiting room with the kids, all the while praying harder than you have ever prayed in your life, because these babies are already yours regardless of any test results.  You already love them.  You are Mommy.


You cry in the car after the doctor tells you that your babies are going to be okay and gives you her home email address.  You praise God that you carry two new growth charts. 

You sing in the car, in the shower, in the kitchen.  You dance everywhere.  You wake up next to the happiest man on the planet, because he thinks it's "Christmas" everyday.  You realize (all over again) that you married a very brave man, and you can't believe you get to spend the rest of your life with him on this crazy adventure.


You thank God, over and over again, for His perfect timing.


You dossier lands in Ethiopia, sent over just days before your referral. 


You realize that you wrote this post the day before you got your referral pictures and met your children, and that God was preparing your heart for what you would see.

You realize that the day

you mailed in your initial application

to the adoption agency was also the day that
your son was born.

Your prayer journal shows

that you began praying for his Mama

 on that same day.

You wake before the sun, kneel to meet your Maker, and He tells you in His own special way what every adoptive mother wants to hear from Him and Him alone, because it is the only legalization that matters....

These are your children. 

You thank Him, and you place them back into His Hands. 

Because they are His.

Because He chose you. 

Our New Babies!

We accepted referrals
for two little miracle babies!

In one afternoon,
two unrelated orphans from the same orphanage
became the newest loves of our lives, and received the promise of family to each other.

I can't post pictures until after court, but I did take a video of us opening our referral email and seeing their faces for the first time.  These are the still frames:

We saw our boy first...

We loved him in an instant.

He is about 1 month old and weighs about 7 pounds.  His face is strong and determined, and he has taken my heart.  Finally, we have our boy!

Then we met our girl....

There aren't  any words.

She is about 6 months and weighs about 9 pounds.  She is a happy little miracle.  Her smile is something that I am not capable of describing with a keyboard. Just wait until you see her; she will take your breath away.

What happens now?  We pray.

We need to travel to Ethiopia twice in the next few months for court and then for pick-up, but in the meantime we ask that these babies will be covered with your prayers. 

We praise God that these babies who had no one now live together and have each other as "family" while they wait to come home.

Their stories belong to them,

but I will tell you that they need and deserve

to be shown mercy and justice in this life.

Both babies are malnourished. 

Pray for their health, and for the lives of the other babies who are fighting to survive a famine.

Lastly, pray for our family.

This is now a double adoption.

We do not have ANYTHING it takes to pull this off...

But God does.  He offers us Hope. 

(Hope is seeing things as they should be

in order to make them change.)

Babies should not starve.  

Children should have parents.

They should have hope.

(On Earth as it is in Heaven.)

¹⁵ The Spirit you received does not make you slaves,

so that you live in fear again;

rather, the Spirit you received

brought about your adoption to sonship. 

And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”

- Romans 8:15

Abba, Father!

Thank you for letting us love your babies! 

Thank you for being the same,

never-changing God of the scriptures;

working your miracles even today.

Thank you for choosing us,
and for showing us that there were
two little people missing from our family!

- Missy

(proud Mama)

A New Day

I wrote this post on Thursday September 29th.

   We received our referral the next morning.

                             I hadn't slept all week.....

__________________________________________

Every night, I fall asleep with expectations for the next day that can only be equalled with the palpable childhood joy of Christmas Eve.  I fall asleep thinking of what could happen the next day.

At any moment of any day (including today!), my phone could ring, and within 2 minutes of that call, I could be looking at an emailed picture of my child's face.  It's an experience that normally happens in the delivery room.

Every time the phone rings, my chest bottoms out like I have been shot out of a cannon.

About noon everyday since we began the waiting, I light a candle on my mantle.  It helps as 5 o'clock draws nearer. 

At the end of the business day, I know the call is not coming.
Another day has passed, and the sleigh has passed over the house.

We haven't been waiting long at all, but there is something odd about this first period of waiting.  Right now, we are waiting for our child to "land".  They are out there, somewhere, in a famine-filled third-country.  My prayer is that they are already in "the system", or that they are still safe within someone's arms or tummy. 

I don't like to think about the in-betweens.  There are other scenarios that my mind protectively does not allow me to fully process.

Once we get that picture, we know that our child is being fed and recieving medical care.  We also know that someone who loved that child has died or had their heart broken in the process.

(I was stunned to find out that most of Africa is not afforded the priveledge of medical care.  Africa contains 10% of our world's people and carries 60% percent of our world's HIV.  -Red Letters) 

No medical care.  Just AIDS. 

So knowing that our child has landed in an orphanage is a comfort to us, because they are more likely to receive medical care there.  Isn't that odd?  The sentence I just typed is a tragedy, and it brings this Mommy comfort.  Welcome to adoptionland.

After 5pm, my faith flickers, and a slight panic sets in.  Night is falling.  Where are these kids, all of these kids, going to sleep?  Is my child one of them? 

Addis Ababa, Ethiopia:

I pray.

Tomorrow is a new day. 

Tomorrow could be the day that a child, even my child, finds refuge.

And it always comes back to God.  We are all on this path towards refuge, waiting for our chance to go home.  We are all waiting on a call that could come tomorrow.

We can get our Christmas Eve hope back.  We all have something to hope for.  We are all waiting for that better place. 

The truth is, Christmas Eve hope is available to all Christians, every single night.  Because tomorrow, you may see your Savior's face.  Tomorrow could be the day that the trumpets blast, and the day that this hijacked planet sees its Redemption Day. 

Tomorrow could be the day when you stand in line, peeking ahead to see how many more people are left before it is your turn to meet your Savior.  You inch closer, and you see that smile, hear His voice.  Closer still, and you feel that peace.

It's your turn now.  You reach the personal space of Jesus Christ, and that beautiful face says your name.    

"Well done, my good and faithful servant."

Every day is Christmas Eve.  

Give that joy to someone who needs it.

Let's start preparing for tomorrow. 

Let's give up our tiny loaves for the grand feast. 

“Live as though Christ died yesterday,

rose from the grave today,

and is coming back tomorrow.”

-T. Epp



Missy

Guest Blogger: Ask 5 for 5

Guest Blogger: Sarah Lenssen from #Ask5for5

Family photos by Mike Fiechtner Photography

Thank you, The Oasis, and nearly 150 other bloggers from around the world for allowing me to share a story with you today, during Social Media Week.

A hungry child in East Africa can't wait.  Her hunger consumes her while we decide if we'll respond and save her life.  In Somalia, children are stumbling along for days, even weeks, on dangerous roads and with empty stomachs in search of food and water.  Their crops failed for the third year in a row.  All their animals died.  They lost everything.  Thousands are dying along the road before they find help in refugee camps. 

At my house, when my three children are hungry, they wait minutes for food, maybe an hour if dinner is approaching.  Children affected by the food crisis in Ethiopia, Kenya, and Somalia aren't so lucky.  Did you know that the worst drought in 60 years is ravaging whole countries right now, as you read this?  Famine, a term not used lightly, has been declared in Somalia.  This is the world's first famine in 20 years. 

12.4 million people are in need of emergency assistance and over 29,000 children have died in the last three months alone.  A child is dying every 5 minutes.  It it estimated that 750,000 people could die before this famine is over.  Take a moment and let that settle in.

The media plays a major role in disasters.  They have the power to draw the attention of society to respond--or not.  Unfortunately, this horrific disaster has become merely a footnote in most national media outlets.  News of the U.S. national debt squabble and the latest celebrity's baby bump dominate headlines. 

That is why I am thrilled that nearly 150 bloggers from all over the world are joining together today to use the power of social media to make their own headlines; to share the urgent need of the almost forgotten with their blog readers.  Humans have the capacity to care deeply for those who are suffering, but in a situation like this when the numbers are too huge to grasp and the people so far away, we often feel like the little we can do will be a drop in the ocean, and don't do anything at all.

 

When news of the famine first hit the news in late July, I selfishly avoided it.  I didn't want to read about it or hear about it because I knew I would feel overwhelmed and uncomfortable.  I wanted to protect myself.  I knew I would need to do something if I knew what was really happening.  

You see, this food crisis is personal.  I have a 4-year-old son and a 1 yr-old daughter who were adopted from Ethiopia and born in regions now affected by the drought.  If my children still lived in their home villages, they would be two of the 12.4 million.  My children: extremely hungry and malnourished?  Gulp.

I think any one of us would do anything we could for our hungry child.  But would you do something for

another mother's hungry child?

My friend and World Vision staffer, Jon Warren, was recently in Dadaab Refugee Camp in Kenya--the largest refugee camp in the world with over 400,000 people.  He told me the story of Isnino Siyat, 22, a mother who walked for 10 days and nights with her husband, 1 yr-old-baby, Suleiman, and 4 yr.-old son Adan Hussein, fleeing the drought in Somalia.  When she arrived at Dadaab, she built the family a shelter with borrowed materials while carrying her baby on her back. Even her dress is borrowed.  As she sat in the shelter on her second night in camp she told Jon, "I left because of hunger. It is a very horrible drought which finished both our livestock and our farm." The family lost their 5 cows and 10 goats one by one over 3 months, as grazing lands dried up.  "We don't have enough food now...our food is finished.  I am really worried about the future of my children and myself if the situation continues."


 

Will you help a child like Baby Suleiman?
Ask5for5 is a dream built upon the belief that you will.
 The concept is simple, give $5 and ask five of your friends to give $5, and then they each ask five of their friends to give $5 and so on--in nine generations of 5x5x5...we could raise $2.4 Million!  In one month, over 750 people have donated over $25,000!  I set up a fundraiser at See Your Impact and 100% of the funds will go to World Vision, an organization that has been fighting hunger in the Horn of Africa for decades and will continue long after this famine has ended.
Donations can multiply up to 5 times in impact by government grants to help provide emergency food, clean water, agricultural support, healthcare, and other vital assistance to children and families suffering in the Horn.

I need you to help me save lives.  It's so so simple; here's what you need to do:

1. Donate $5 or more on this page (http://seeyourimpact.org/members/ask5for5)
2. Send an email to your friends and ask them to join us.
3. Share #Ask5for5 on Facebook and Twitter!

I'm looking for another 100 bloggers to share this post on their blogs throughout Social Media Week.  Email me at ask5for5@gmail.com if you're interested in participating this week.

A hungry child doesn't wait.  She doesn't wait for us to finish the other things on our to-do list, or get to it next month when we might have a little more money to give.  She doesn't wait for us to decide if she's important enough to deserve a response.  She will only wait as long as her weakened little body will hold on...please respond now and help save her life.  Ask 5 for 5.

Thank you on behalf of all of those who will be helped. 

You are saving lives and changing history.

- Sarah
________________________________

Thank you to my guest blogger, Sarah.

Thank you to all of you who
read every word and take action. 
You are my heroes.

Missy

...as it is in Heaven

A dear friend of mine married a gorgeous, single Christian mommy.  From what I know of her, he hit the jackpot.  She leads her children to trust blindly, even at a young age.  This mommy had one daughter when they got married; now they have a total of three children together.

When adoption was just a tiny seed in my heart, my friend shared this with me:

 "If you ever wonder, God is more than capable of allowing you to love someone else's child as much as your own. I'm experiencing that now with my step-daughter and our other two children.
I seriously forget sometimes that I'm not her biological dad. I think it's neat." 

My friend is loving his daughter like God loves us. 
Not by acceptance. By total amnesia.  God wipes us clean and FORGETS that we were ever not His.

When you adopt internationally, you get a "referral picture" of the prospective child that the agency has matched you with, and you get to say "yes" or "no". 

The pictures I have seen from other parents are rough.  They are pictures of sick, dirty, confused children.  Parents who have adopted remind me of their child's referral picture in comparison with the "now". 

They say things like: 

"It was so sad, he had bruises on his head." 

Or "Her eyes looked dead." 

When God thinks of His adopted children,
He can't even access our "referral picture". 
After He cleans us and forgives us, He burns that picture. 

He doesn't even remember it.  

 

Thank you to the fathers on this earth

who mirror the love of our Father in Heaven.

Thank you to my Heavenly Father,
for burning MY picture
and placing an eternal crown
on my undeserving head.

All Fall Down

For a while now, my dreams have been of paperwork and notaries.  Every night.  This was one of many reasons why I was so grateful to turn over the paperwork and start the wait. 

I've been having a new dream: 
A tiny bright light in the distance, beaming with an intensity that pulses like a heartbeat.  It's beautiful.





But there are thoughts you have in the darkness that no one prepares you for.

Right now, adoption is literally under attack.  There is much concern about trafficking and adoption abuse.  When you begin the adoption journey, these facts hit you in the face and chase you in the night.

What if my child could have remained with their parents for a few dollars a month?  What if there is a mother crying in the night for the child she just gave up due to poverty? 

It's enough to make you quit.  Or take the entire adoption loan and donate it to a mother, or a family, or a village.

Dr. Jane Aronson responded to the recent adoption concerns in the Huffington Post yesterday:  "Why did we create such a marvelous bureaucracy to improve international adoption practices and not pour some of that money into the welfare of mothers in these countries?" 

The reality is that if we feed the mothers, we feed the children.  If we educate the mothers, we save the children.  If we give parents access to antiretroviral medications for HIV/AIDS, lives are saved and families remain intact.

I have noticed that parents of internationally adopted children naturally fall into a common stream of charities or causes.  You would think it would be "Adopt!  We did it!  It's great!"  It is; but it's not.  The causes are AIDS, poverty, and clean water.  It is a natural progression to care for these things when you care for a child affected by AIDS, poverty, and famine.  Promoting these issues are promoting orphan care. 

There is a major dilemna that we all must face as Christians at some point.  As Americans, we are ALL wealthy in comparison to the rest of this world.  As Americans, we are known to the rest of this world as a "Christian nation". 

Americans give to the hungry at a low percentage of their GNP (gross national product) in comparison to other nations.  What are we, as individual wealthy Christian Americans, telling the poverty-stricken world around us about Jesus Christ?  What are we telling the world about the Gospels? 

We are NOT the widow giving up her two coins. 

We are the rich, making a big show of our tiny gifts. 

Our adoption is not fixing any large problem.  It is just an act of obedience.  You may not feel called to adopt, but I will tell you that you can still do something to impact the orphan crisis in a huge way...you can sponsor a child.  You can be an active voice for the hungry and the poor, putting action behind your voice.  You can be aware that "if you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep, you are richer than seventy five percent of the people in the world." 

We can raise our children to understand that our wealth is determined by what we give to Jesus, not what we keep for ourselves.  We can give until it hurts; the essense of "sacrificial giving".  It's a lesson that I think I will have to spend the rest of my life learning, as I struggle to un-learn the American Dream and realign myself with the words of Jesus Christ. 

When I get caught up in the ethics of adoption, I remember the waiting children in the videos.  Waiting in cribs that are lined up like kennels.  Waiting in beds lined with chicken wire, crying for their loss of everything, waiting for us to figure out what to do with them, while we argue over pie charts about how to do it.

Paul and I have been called to carry one of these children, maybe more than one, as our own.  I don't know why.  I don't have to.  It's just The Plan.  What happens after that point will be our mission and responsibility for the rest of our lives; to care for and promote that child's country, to bring to the attention of other Christians the poverty and disease that is swallowing children and people whole.  I am grateful for this burden.

Thank you, Lord.

For breaking my heart.

No Greater Love

 

A friend is someone who is happy to see you

who will hold your hand on the long journey

A friend cheers you on in the small things

....they bring you back to the flock when you accidentally wander too far.

A friend is someone to break bread with

And someone to pray with

A friend celebrates your new life.

They make you brave.

A friend stands beside you when you face the wilderness.

Thank you for being my friends.

You know who you are.

"I thank my God every time I remember you."

- Philippians 1:3

I'm Gonna Be Your Friend

                   

This is happening right now.

Please share this video.  With everyone.

 

Missy

"He's From Ethiopia"

*****

Enkutatash 2012!  

Post from one year ago today...pre-referral by only a few days.  What a year it has been!

*****

Lunch with our friends from the movie theater
was a success.



We met our new friends at a

local authentic Ethiopian restaurant.

It was authentic.  No silverware.

The kids got along instantly.

Isaac and Emma Grace taught Lilly that the
"pancakes" were actually "injera". 

 

Daisy was a good sport.  She tried "injera" and "kik alicha".

The waitress insisted that this was "perfect for babies".  When Daisy tried it,

the waitress declared that Daisy was "very smart".

Then Daisy finished her Uncrustable.

Jesus was there.

At our table, and on the walls.

The kids made good use of the stage

and the ceremonial play area coffee area.

The guys were able to finish off most of the platters. 

And by "guys", I mean Issac.

Isaac paid the tab for his family.

It was a very cute moment.

Here's to new friends and family.

Enkutatash...

Happy Ethiopian New Years 2011!

(There aren't enough ways

to say "Thank You."

My cup overflows.....)